


Land On Your Feet

by transmarkcohen



Category: Rent - Larson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2019-01-09
Packaged: 2019-08-11 11:33:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16474766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transmarkcohen/pseuds/transmarkcohen
Summary: My life’s been thrown out of balance. Just by existing.





	1. Chapter 1

Day 1 

 

I’m still shaking. Buying this journal may be the most important decision I’ve ever made. And the day I’ve had-oh, God, how could I ever tell anyone what’s happened to me? It’s all to much. 

 

My hand is shaking. I used the wrong kind of to. I odn’t care. I can’t write. It’m crying and it’s fogging up my glasses but none of that relaly matters does it? It doesn’t matter ever can’t see to write-fuck, did I mean “if I” instead of ever? 

 

I need to put this down. It’ll be gone int h e morning. Nothing will have ever happened. fuck. 

 

DAY 2!!!!! 

 

I can’t even write down how angry I am at the universe. At least it’s a better option than being scared. Fear leads to nowhere, as far as I can tell. 

 

Okay. Okay. This can all be okay. Let me just... try to make sense out of what’s happened. 

 

What do people usually write down in diaries? They write about their day. That’s right. And it’s typical stuff, for the most part. 

 

OKay. I can do that. Okay. I’m afraid if I stop saying okay then  _ nothing  _ will be okay and I’ll scream and have to explain to Roger that I- 

 

It’s fine. It’s fine. Mark, calm down. 

So yesterday. Let’s see. 

 

6:00 AM - woke up. too early. went back to sleep. 

 

6:30 AM - woke up again. still too early. couldn’t get back to sleep and got dressed. 

 

6:45 AM - had breakfast. cereal. favorite kind of breakfast. simple and quick and makes sure no one can interrupt me eating. 

 

7:00 AM - sat at table in living room trying to write screenplay. Roger came out of his room. stood in the doorway for a few seconds. left. not unusual Roger behavior. 

 

7:10 AM - gave up on screenplay. 

 

7:12 AM - Mom called. Whined about my career choice. Had a fight. Hung up the phone. 

 

7:30 - noon - did nothing. not literally. but the kind of thing that everybody calls nothing. 

 

12:00 PM - got bored. headed outside with camera. 

 

12:05 PM - was fiddling with camera, walked into the street without looking, jaywalking, and got hit by car 

 

12:07 PM - laid in street in faint stupor. very confused. frightened. paramedics arrived. sirens. loud, loud ambulance sirens. 

 

12:07 PM - the world went black. I wasn’t sure at first, but I know now. 

 

12:07 PM - died. 

 

Next thing I knew, I was back in my own bed again and it was 6:00 AM. I swore it was a dream. But I had to go to the store and write down everything that had happened. I bought this journal and was convinced it was a dream until this morning. But I still remember the feeling of that car hitting me. 

 

I asked Roger if anything had happened yesterday to me. If I’d been injured somehow. 

 

He looked at me like I’d grown two heads. 


	2. Chapter 2

Day 3 

 

That thing two days ago? 

 

Well, after the fact, (haha, quite literally, clever, Cohen) I decided not to go out filming. At all. Roger asked why. I told him I was writing. 

 

I’ve never seen anybody laugh so hard. 

 

It’s good for him, though. I only want him to be happy. 

 

Day 4 

 

I’ve been so careful. I don’t want-whatever that  _ was  _ to happen again. I don’t want to die. 

 

The phone just rang. Ugh. I don’t want to get it. 

 

Fine. I’ll get it. I’m bored anyway. 

 

“Roger?” 

“Roger? What-why are you asking for him?” 

She gasped sharply. “Oh-oh, dear God…I must be hallucinating.” 

“No? Mom, what’s going on?” 

“You died!” 

 

For the first time ever today, Mom hung up the phone first. 

 

I wrote down the voicemail to make sure  _ I  _ wasn’t hallucinating. 

 

She apparently thinks I died. 

 

Did I actually die?? I mean, I clearly did, but I’m alive now? 

 

I’m so frustrated. Nothing makes sense. 

 

Day 5 

 

Went to the Catscratch. Slept with five different people. 

 

Something is happening to me and I’m not sure what it is but I’ll go crazy if I don’t figure it out soon. 


	3. Chapter 3

Day 6 

 

Gonna do this again. So, yesterday. 

 

7:00 AM - woke up. Actually got some decent sleep for once. Recently, it’s been so, so fucking hard to get to sleep. 

 

7:25 AM - went to the Catscratch 

 

7:30 AM - 1:00 PM - slept with various people. Mostly vanilla sex. 

 

1:10 PM - headed home 

 

1:12 PM - wrote in journal 

 

1:30 PM - went up to the roof to film. 

 

1:33 PM - tried to get a better angle. walked to edge of roof to film. didn’t notice how far i was. lost my balance. 

 

1:34 PM - died. again. hurt more than the car. 

 

Something is happening to me and I don’t know  _ what  _ but I keep dying and getting resurrected.  

 

What is wrong with me? 

 

Day 7 

 

I normally haven’t ever been able to keep a journal, but I fear even the small things now. If I let this go then I lose all sense of time and of my own mortality, which I think the universe threw away for me, on purpose for some reason. 

  Do I want to find out why this is happening? Yes. Am I any further into figuring anything about? Absolutely fucking not. My mom still thinks I’m dead and Roger is endlessly confused. He knows I’m alive. As far as he’s concerned, it’s only been six days, not seven. 

  And through all of this, somehow there’s a romantic subplot through in! I’m so angry! I don’t deserve to be angry because he just kissed me and that’s not a thing to be angry about, but with everything I just can’t handle romance! 

I’m gonna go jack off now. 


End file.
